Hello, Is This Thing On?

If you can explain everything, what's left to believe in?

Ready For Launch

Sunny Cadwallader

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Say, what?

Have you ever been in flux? Sounds like a medical condition. Like something you need to take medication for or one of those late night infomercials – Got flux? We can help. 

For most of the past decade, I’ve been writing about sports. I always wanted to work in sports. I grew up loving and playing sports. I knew sports better than most men and definitely more than most women. 

Over the past couple of years, however, something has changed. 

Yes, the world of sports has changed – some ways that’s good and…not so much in others. Sports used to be an escape, but now society, real life is deeply intertwined with it. 

To some degree, it’s good. Long dormant conversations are happening on greater scale. Racism, sexism, diversity, domestic abuse – social media has brought those to the forefront, even in sports. 

These are conversations that need to happen. The positive actions that come as a result are necessary. But along the way, there is also the negative. 

Fans/general public trolling/attacking media and athletes. And yes, believe it or not, media and athletes attacking the fans/general public. Before anyone says it doesn’t…just stop. I’ve seen it. It happens. Media are just as guilty of the same ridiculous behavior as fans/general public. 

Trying to see both sides – fan and media – is a recipe for discontent. That’s what I’ve “always” tried to do. Always is in quotes because who among us is able to do everything they hope to do every single day at every moment they want. 

Unless your name is Jesus Ch-…well…you get it.

To paraphrase the Borg: Perfectionism is futile. 

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Engage…Listening

Nobody is perfect. But, I do try to see all sides of an issue. The older I get, the more open-minded I’ve become. It doesn’t mean I won’t still hold on to my beliefs and ideals. I’m just more willing to listen and meditate on an opposing viewpoint.

Key Word = Listen. 

That doesn’t fly with today’s sports media. Some of the loudest voices on sports Twitter are people who only think one way and they judge or put on blast anyone who disagrees with them. They operate with a mindset of I’m media. I know more than you, so just sit down, shut up and listen to me.

Is that the majority? No. But it is the loud, very vocal, very arrogant minority that live on Twitter. They come across as angry and bitter people living in a world of pain, hurt and unforgiveness. 

Life is too short to live in that kind of existence. 

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1968 – These Are The Voyages…

1968 was a memorable year for many reasons. On a personal level, it’s the year I was born. 

So yes, that means I am turning 50 this year. 

When I turned 49, I thought I would do a bunch of cool things in my 50th year on earth. Five months away from my birthday and…welp…nothing super cool to tell you about. I’ve lost about 15 pounds, but that’s about it. 

The closer I get to that number the more I keep feeling like this year isn’t about doing something cool. It’s about an internal shift. A shift in thinking. A shift in focus. A shift emotionally. A shift spiritually. 

Just…a shift. 

Life is too dog-gone short, folks. It’s too short to get caught up in Twitter followers or Facebook & Instagram likes. I mean, what’s next? Someone has their gravestone made before they die and post it on IG just so they can see how many people like them before they go? 

Sorry….a bit morbid, eh? 

Life is too short to hold on to pain and hurt. It’s too short to live in anger or regret. Forgive and move on. 

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you forget. Far from it. In simple terms, it means you release the hold the other person has over you. Forgive and let them deal with the memory of pain and hurt they caused. 

It also doesn’t mean you keep them in your life. There are people whom I have been hurt by – some quite deeply. I’ve forgiven them and let them go. They’re no longer a part of my life. I don’t need the drama they bring with their presence, so no need to keep them in my life. 

Life’s too short for that, remember?

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What’s Your Heading?

Sports is no longer the love it once was for me. It was painful to admit to myself. I’m turning 50 and sports has been in my life since I was born. My 83 year-old mother is a huge sports fan to this day. She loves it more than I do, so when I say “since I was born”, I mean it. 

Without sports, then what? 

Welllllllll………

I don’t know yet. Sports is still a part of my life because of work, but that’s work. Work doesn’t define me. 

My last child will be out of the house in the next few years. Being real here, I’ve been a parent since I was 17. I haven’t had an adult life sans kids. That’s what makes this next phase so exciting and a little intimidating. 

Seeing as how this first post is a lot longer than I planned, it’s obvious I love to write. It’s therapeutic for me. My brain runs 100 mph, so it’s good to get these thoughts out of my head and onto a screen (or paper, in the old days). 

I want to make a difference. Many people say that, but how many of us actually follow through on it? Ideally, I’d love to make a difference through sports – #SportsDoingGood. But, I need to just do. I need to go out and do it. 

How? When? Where?

Patience

I’m not sure how this next phase of making a difference is supposed to look. We all have to start somewhere, so I’m starting with this blog. I’ll write and…be patient. 

I’ve seen many hurting people in the online world. Media, fans, celebrities, athletes. Pain is no respecter of status. Maybe that’s where I’m headed – to help people online who wouldn’t normally ask for help. 

Or maybe it’s just to write in order to encourage others. I like encouraging people and helping them recognize their gifts within and how amazing they are as a person not their title/label/status. 

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Set Phase(rs) On Stun

I believe the next phase for me will happen. It will evolve. For now, it’s indefinable. But, I believe it will happen. 

If you saw the lead photo to this post, you’ll understand what I mean. (Yes, I quoted a line from one of the Star Trek franchises. I’m a Trekkie.) I can’t define what it looks like. Science, intelligence, psychology can’t define it. I know what I believe. 

What I believe in is faith – believing even when logic says otherwise. Faith hasn’t let me down yet. I needed faith to be a single mom (more on that in a future post). I needed faith to move away from family and friends (more on that in a future post). I needed faith to be a (hopefully decent) wife and mom (more on that in a future post). I needed faith to travel to new places by myself (more on that in a future post). I needed faith to leave a safe, secure job to work in sports (more on that in a future post). I needed faith to introduce myself as a journalist and interviewing sports people WITHOUT a degree (more on that in a future post). I needed faith to teach myself to become a writer and show host (more on that….nvm). 

I’ve needed faith my entire adult life. I wouldn’t be here without it. I have faith now for this next…adventure. 

Maybe that’s it. The faith adventure. 

Hmm…..

Prayers Up, Knees Down

Sunny Cadwallader (aka CadChica)